Return to a BMI of 20: How Middle-Aged People Can Lose Weight Safely Without Pitfalls

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Over the past half year, I embarked on a serious and deliberate weight-loss journey — and after eight months, I successfully lost 12 kilograms. I dropped 8 kilograms in the first four months, and after returning to a normal diet, I lost another 4. My BMI has now returned to 20.5 — a number I haven’t seen in years.It might not sound like a dramatic transformation, but the difference feels enormous. My body is lighter, my energy steadier, and, more importantly, I’ve built lasting habits: eating with a balanced nutrient ratio, avoiding overly processed foods, and including regular strength training in my routine.

Throughout the process, I never relied on starving myself, extreme workouts, sheer willpower, medication, or personal trainers. My approach was simple, low-cost, and realistic. I learned by reading studies, researching credible sources, and learning from trustworthy experiences — then gradually finding a lifestyle that worked for me and could be sustained after reaching my goal.

In this article, I’d like to share the insights and reflections I gained during my weight-loss journey. The first half is a bit long, but if you’re mainly interested in my specific methods, feel free to skip ahead to Part IV.

Starting Point: Weight Loss Begins With Recognizing Obesity

Mistake #1: Ignoring the Warning Signs of Your Body

It all started with a family photo taken during Lunar New Year.

On New Year’s Eve, I was just happily focused on eating and drinking. Someone casually snapped a group photo and sent it to the family chat.Suddenly, a relative asked, “Who is that person?” — referring to me.As if that wasn’t enough, my gossip-loving cousin’s wife DM’ed me privately and asked whether I was pregnant.

Utterly confused, I looked closely at the photo — and I was shocked:
Who is this person?! Why so bloated?! Why do I look nothing like the version of myself I see in the mirror every day?!I then scrolled through the handful of photos of myself from the past two years.Horror set in.When did I become so fat?Double-wide cheeks.Triple-layered chin folds.
A bulging belly and elephant-like legs bursting out even under a dark, loose shirt.Yet I had somehow remained oblivious to it all.

(Multiple times I considered sharing my real before-photo here… ultimately deleted it.)

Many people in middle age share a similar moment of realization — that instant when you look in the mirror, try on clothes, or see yourself in a photo and suddenly think: When did I get this fat?Before that moment, even though your body has clearly changed, you might have been completely unaware — or deliberately ignoring it. Some people even admit that while they know they’ve gained weight, they avoid facing it by refusing to step on the scale, look in the mirror, or take photos. It’s as if not checking somehow means it’s not real — a small psychological trick we play to avoid confronting an uncomfortable truth.

But no one becomes overweight overnight. Significant weight gain or body changes — aside from certain medication side effects — are always the result of long-term poor eating habits and lifestyle choices. For women in particular, hormonal shifts can lead to increased fat storage and slower metabolism. This means that even if your eating habits stay the same, age alone can gradually cause weight gain.That’s why noticing these changes early and making timely adjustments is so important. If, like I once did, you rarely pay attention to your body or weight, it’s worth learning a few basic facts about how weight works.

Know and Track Your BMI

While body weight or BMI can’t tell the whole story, it remains a simple and practical indicator of overall health. The formula for calculating BMI is: weight (kg) ÷ height² (m²). A healthy BMI typically falls between 18.5 and 24. Below 18.5 is considered underweight, 24–28 indicates overweight, and anything above 28 is classified as obesity. It’s important to have at least a general understanding of these ranges.

Body Mass Index (BMI) Classification Ranges

Once your BMI enters the “overweight” range, it’s time to pay closer attention — review your eating habits and make timely adjustments. If it reaches the “obese” category, it’s best to consult a doctor for proper evaluation and treatment.

That said, there’s no need to weigh yourself every single day — it’s meaningless and only creates unnecessary emotional swings. Your weight can fluctuate for many trivial reasons: eating a heavy meal, consuming salty foods that cause water retention, constipation, layering up in winter clothes, or hormonal changes during your menstrual cycle. None of these reflect real fat gain.In general, weighing yourself once a week is perfectly sufficient. Don’t obsess over the number — use BMI as a tool to track your health and overall weight trend, not as a daily verdict on your body.

Body Fat Percentage Matters More

Compared with BMI, body fat percentage is often a more useful indicator during weight loss, as it reflects how much of your total body weight is actually fat. Two middle-aged men might both have a BMI of 28, yet if one has 10% body fat and the other 40%, their physiques — and their health risks — are completely different.

Comparison of BMI 28 with body fat percentages of 10% and 40% (AI image)

Many home scales claim to measure body fat percentage, but most of these numbers are only estimates based on height and weight, and therefore far from precise. Even the more professional InBody analyzers at gyms can show noticeable fluctuations depending on your physical condition that day — variations of 3–5% are considered normal. So, don’t take those readings as absolute truth. If you genuinely want a more accurate measurement, consider getting a body-fat caliper to measure subcutaneous fat thickness. It’s simple, inexpensive, and often more reliable. You can easily find tutorials online.

Body Comparisons Between Men and Women at Different Body Fat Percentages

Also, many online “standard” body-fat charts are unrealistically low. For example, Baidu Baike suggests that women’s body fat should be 20–25% and men’s 15–18%. In reality, most people won’t reach such idealized numbers. For women, a body fat percentage around 25% already reveals a faint outline of abdominal muscles — the so-called “abs line” — which is quite rare among middle-aged women. According to doctors I’ve consulted, for women who don’t regularly work out, anything under 30% is perfectly normal. There’s no need to be overly harsh on yourself for not meeting those textbook figures.

waist circumference.

A tape measure from your sewing kit or even a paper ruler from IKEA will do. For both men and women, regularly recording your waist size (for example, once every one or two weeks) can reflect your health status more accurately than obsessing over your weight.This is especially true for many men who develop a prominent belly due to visceral fat accumulation, which is highly detrimental to health. Of course, using the correct evaluation standards is important too — the average person’s waist may still be quite far from the “ideal” figure, so don’t pursue extreme waist measurements.

Observe other physiological indicators

If there’s a group of people in this world who are forever on diets, forever dissatisfied with their bodies, there’s an equal number who couldn’t care less about weight — they simply enjoy eating and the pleasures of food. That’s perfectly fine as long as you’re at peace with yourself; there’s no need for excessive body anxiety. For these friends I have one small suggestion: pay moderate attention to your health. It’s important both for you and for your family.

Besides regular check-ups, one useful practice is to discuss your body changes with close friends or relatives every few months (for example, every three or six months) and listen to their impressions. Especially if family members kindly tell you that you’re snoring more, moving less, or generally seem less active — drop the defensive stance and don’t immediately make excuses. Seriously observe your physical changes and ask yourself: as my weight increased, am I getting tired more easily? Is climbing stairs becoming harder? Do my knees hurt after walking a bit more? Are my blood pressure, lipids, and blood sugar results normal on check-ups? Do I often feel dizzy or lightheaded after meals (“post-meal carb crashes”)? If any of the above apply, take it seriously: put weight loss on the agenda and face the problem for the sake of your health instead of avoiding it.

Goal: Everyone Has Their Own Ideal Weight

Mistake #1: Blindly Chasing Society’s Definition of “Thin”

When I finally realized I was overweight, I took a step back and tried to recall how I had gotten to this point.

I’ve always considered myself quite lucky. For most of my life, weight was never something I had to worry about — I had never even tried dieting before. A big part of this was thanks to my parents. Both my parents and grandparents were of average build, so I probably didn’t inherit an “easy-to-gain” body type. On top of that, my mother has always been extremely mindful about nutrition and cooking. Her style, especially among her generation, was rather rare.Here’s one small example: during Chinese New Year, we were the only family who never ate leftovers. My mom somehow managed to cook fresh dishes for every meal — always balanced with meat and vegetables. Usually two or three dishes on a normal day, and up to five or six during holidays, all served on small six-inch plates so that the three of us could finish everything without waste. She seldom fried food, and used oil and salt sparingly. I can count on one hand how many times I’ve eaten deep-fried food at home.

I came across photos from the 2019 Spring Festival—New Year’s Eve and the first day of the Lunar New Year—showing the meals my mom cooked. This pretty much sums up her everyday style.

Because of this, even though I had a big appetite as a child, our meals were always healthy — fresh milk, fish, shrimp, eggs, moderate carbs, mild seasoning, and plenty of fruits and vegetables every day. I maintained an average build well into adulthood, with my BMI hovering around 20–22. Having a simple, healthy outlook on body image, I’d never felt anxious about my appearance, nor had I ever restricted my diet.

But after entering middle age and starting a family of my own, my lifestyle slowly began to change. Cooking at home became a chore, so I relied more on takeout and eating out. I enjoy socializing, so three or four dinners a week were spent with friends or colleagues — justified as “treating myself.” My partner prefers staying in, so my weekend outings dropped significantly. These small lifestyle shifts, when combined, led to a fundamental change. Over the past two or three years, my weight quietly crept up from a steady 60kg to 70kg. My body felt heavier, and I noticed I was getting lazier, more easily fatigued, sleepier after meals, and snoring louder at night. Digestive discomforts became more frequent too.

After assessing my condition, I decided to start my first real weight-loss journey. My goal wasn’t ambitious — just to return from 70kg to around 60kg, where I had been for years. I set two milestones: a pass line at 62kg (BMI 22), which I’d consider a success, and an ideal line at 59kg (BMI 21), which would give me a small buffer for rebound weight.As it turns out, I not only reached my ideal weight — now at 58kg — but also maintained it steadily for months with normal eating, no rebound or appetite surge. It proved that my goal was both realistic and sustainable.

Of course, this is just my experience. When I shared my story with friends, I realized I was relatively lucky. I don’t have obesity-related genes, my weight gain wasn’t due to illness or medication, and I had no history of long-term obesity — my highest BMI was only around 25. Essentially, I was just losing the weight I’d gained over the last couple of years, returning to my natural equilibrium.

I emphasize this because after going through the process myself, I’ve come to appreciate just how different weight loss — and weight maintenance — can be for each person. I used to think losing weight was simple: eat less and move more. But those are only surface-level factors. Behind how much we eat or exercise lie deeper variables — the real roots of weight issues. I used to hold many misconceptions, and I want to share what I’ve learned.

Many aspects that shape our bodies are largely genetic — just look at your parents or grandparents, and you’ll get a sense of your own body’s natural baseline. But other factors, though technically “acquired,” are deeply ingrained: regional diets, family eating habits, childhood weight patterns, medications, illnesses, sleep quality, stress levels, age, hormones, even one’s personal philosophy around food — all play a role.So it’s neither fair nor accurate to oversimplify weight gain as a result of laziness, gluttony, lack of self-control, or “bad dieting.” Obesity is rarely caused by a single factor — it’s a complex interplay of biology, environment, and psychology.

As we age, our hormone levels naturally shift — and this makes it easier for our bodies to store fat.

We all know people who seem to eat endlessly without ever gaining weight. They don’t watch what they eat, never go on diets, yet somehow stay effortlessly slim. On the other hand, there are those who have been heavier since childhood, constantly trying to lose weight but never finding lasting success. Their weight fluctuates endlessly, sometimes even climbing higher than before despite repeated efforts.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with being predisposed to gain or lose weight easily — that’s largely biological. But the mindset that stems from this difference can often be unhealthy and damaging.

For instance, it’s perfectly normal to feel a twinge of envy toward people who can “eat anything and stay thin.” However, some beauty-conscious individuals take that envy too far, turning it inward into harsh self-criticism: “Why can they eat so much and still be thin? Why can’t I?” This kind of thinking easily spirals into body shame and extreme dieting, pushing people toward dangerously low body weights and even triggering serious health problems.

Those who are more prone to gaining weight, meanwhile, often face hostility and prejudice. Social media is filled with cruel comments and fat-shaming. A friend of mine, who has been heavy since childhood, once told me that the discrimination she’s endured because of her body is something “thin people could never imagine.”

After I successfully lost weight, I shared my experience with her. She appreciated my approach but told me she had tried every one of those methods before — and had even seen temporary success. Yet within months or a few years, her weight would always rebound, sometimes to levels higher than before. The amount of effort she poured into it — and the physical and emotional toll it took — was something I could hardly comprehend. It’s like Sisyphus pushing his boulder up the hill, only to watch it roll back down, again and again.

That’s why, before starting any weight-loss journey, I hope everyone takes time to honestly assess their body and situation. Ask yourself these questions:

  • Do I really need to lose weight? What is a healthy and reasonable target weight for me?
  • Can I maintain this goal long-term? Think back: have I weighed this amount as an adult before? For how long? Why did my weight increase afterward? Are those factors — such as habits, stress, or environment — something I can change or replace with healthier routines?
  • Am I already within a healthy range? If your BMI is below 20 or even 18.5 and you simply want to “look better,” it might be wiser to shift your goal from losing weight to toning up or building muscle. Never let arbitrary numbers guilt-trip you into punishing your body. Through my work, I’ve seen many cases of teenagers developing mental health issues from body-image obsession — it’s heartbreaking and avoidable.
  • And if you have genetic tendencies toward obesity, a history of being overweight, or conditions and medications that make weight loss difficult — and if you’ve already tried dieting multiple times with repeated rebound — please consult a doctor before trying again.I’ve watched interviews with professional weight-management specialists who often advise middle-aged patients with a BMI of 24–26 to not pursue weight loss, as long as their health indicators are normal. In such cases, maintaining your current state can be perfectly fine.When it comes to health, there’s no single “correct” number — everyone has their own optimal weight. You don’t need to reshape your entire lifestyle just to fit a chart. After all, it’s your body — and you should have the final say in how to live comfortably within it.

Pace: Don’t Rush — Slow Weight Loss Rarely Fails

Mistake #3: Chasing “Lose X Pounds in X Days” Quick Fixes

When most people first decide to lose weight, they instinctively head online to hunt for “miracle methods.” I was no different. A quick search on Xiaohongshu or Bilibili brought up endless titles like “How to Lose X Pounds in 3, 7, or 10 Days,” “Drop 10kg in Two Weeks with a Liquid Diet,” or “Celebrity Weight-Loss Secrets That Burn Fat Fast Without Rebound.”The problem? These “methods” are a mixed bag — a handful may be credible, but many are unscientific, anecdotal, or even outright harmful to your health.

The moment you open Xiaohongshu, you’re bombarded with countless weight-loss methods, making it hard for the average person to discern what works.

For beginners, it’s almost impossible to distinguish the good from the bad at first glance. I didn’t have a clear plan either. My only thought was simple and intuitive: Don’t rush. Take it slow. There’s no need to lose weight fast — after all, I didn’t gain it overnight.
Ironically, that mindset turned out to be my greatest advantage. It kept me away from almost every major dieting pitfall.

Some of the dangers of excessive weight loss (and even more serious ones)

For those who are desperate to lose weight quickly, “slimming down” feels like the only priority. But what they don’t realize is that not losing weight is actually the least harmful outcome of a failed diet.The more serious consequences of rapid or extreme dieting include malnutrition, muscle loss, digestive issues, hormonal imbalance, hair loss, menstrual irregularities, and even binge-eating disorder or anorexia. These problems often strike people who are impatient for results, eager for shortcuts, and willing to ignore basic science in pursuit of speed.Why does rapid weight loss cause such chaos in the body? The explanation is straightforward: obesity is a disease of modern abundance. Throughout most of human history, food scarcity — not excess — was the norm. Our bodies evolved to survive famine, not feast.So when you slash your calories too dramatically, your body interprets it as a threat. It switches into “starvation mode,” lowers your metabolism, shuts down nonessential functions, and floods your brain with hunger hormones. Suddenly, you’re ravenous, obsessed with food, unable to stop eating once you start. It’s your body’s way of protecting you — of staying alive.That’s why trying to “fight” your body’s survival instincts is a losing battle. You’ll end up exhausted, defeated, and possibly injured. A quick scroll through online diet horror stories is all the wake-up call you need.

Now, if someone’s goal is to slim down fast for a one-time event — say, a wedding photoshoot, a film role, or a cosplay of Matthew McConaughey in Dallas Buyers Club — and they truly don’t care about long-term health or rebound, then this article probably isn’t for them.
But for the vast majority of people — especially working adults who need to stay healthy to support families — slow, steady weight loss is the only sustainable path.

So, how fast should you lose weight? What’s a reasonable pace and duration?
In the next section, I’ll share what I’ve learned about finding the right speed for healthy, lasting results — particularly for people whose BMI falls in the slightly overweight or high-normal range.
(And if your BMI is in the obese range, please — see a doctor and follow medical advice. It’s the safest and smartest thing you can do.)

Weight-Loss Method: Daily Energy Control

Controlling your calorie intake (or increasing how much you burn) is the most common — and most fundamental — approach to weight loss. In fact, every “diet method” you’ve ever heard of ultimately boils down to this one principle. Behind it lies the law of energy conservation: to lose weight, you must create an energy deficit.

For those new to this, let’s quickly break it down. Your total daily energy expenditure (TDEE) — the total calories your body burns each day — is made up of three main components:

  • Basal Metabolic Rate (BMR) – the calories your body burns at rest to maintain basic functions like breathing and circulation. It’s influenced by weight, muscle mass, age, and sex, and it stays relatively stable.
  • Activity & Exercise (NEAT + EAT) – calories burned through daily movement and intentional exercise.
  • Thermic Effect of Food (TEF) – the energy your body uses to digest food.For example, when I weighed 70kg, my daily routine was just commuting to work — around 6,000 steps per day and almost no extra exercise. My total daily energy expenditure (TDEE) was roughly 1,800–2,000 kcal (that’s kilocalories, equivalent to about 4.18 kJ each).

TDEE has a calculation formula; you can have an AI calculate it for you.

Primary Components of Total Daily Energy Expenditure (TDEE)

If I ate roughly the same amount — 1,800 to 2,000 kcal daily — my weight would remain stable. I wouldn’t lose or gain, just maintain.To lose weight, you need to create a calorie deficit — that is, consume fewer calories than you burn. You can do this by eating less, moving more, or both. In theory, the larger your deficit, the faster you’ll lose weight.But in reality, there’s a safe range. If you eat far too little, avoid salt and oil, and overtrain, your body will quickly rebel — even if you manage to stick with it for a while. Extreme calorie restriction doesn’t last long before your health starts to decline.When your calorie intake falls below your body’s total energy expenditure, your body draws from stored energy — mainly fat — to make up the difference. Over time, this deficit leads to weight loss.

When energy intake falls below the body’s total energy expenditure, a caloric deficit occurs. Over time, this can lead to weight loss.

For people with an average body type, a daily calorie deficit of no more than 500 kcal is typically safe and sustainable (and to be clear, this applies only to those who truly need to lose weight — not people already under 40kg or 50kg). Those with higher starting weights can extend that to around 750 kcal.

In my own case, I didn’t add much exercise during my weight-loss period. Instead, I kept my daily intake around 1,500 kcal (assuming my TDEE was 2,000).Sticking to that consistently was enough to see results.Some doctors suggest you should never eat less than your basal metabolic rate (BMR) — the calories your body needs for basic survival. Fortunately, for moderately active people with average builds, the gap between total expenditure (TDEE) and BMR usually falls right around that same 500 kcal range, so the two approaches end up quite similar in practice.

Rate of Weight Loss: The Weekly Upper Limit

Calorie control is the method — but the result we’re after is weight loss. So, how fast should you lose weight? The golden rule still applies: slow is fine, but never too fast.I’ve read many different recommendations, and in my opinion, the most reasonable one is this:Your weekly weight loss should not exceed 0.5%–1% of your current body weight.That means if you weigh 70kg, your safe weekly loss is around 0.35kg to 0.7kg, roughly one to one and a half pounds.
At that pace, losing 2–3kg per month is perfectly healthy.Remember — as you lose weight, your basal metabolic rate (BMR) and total body mass both decrease, so you’ll need to periodically adjust your calorie intake and weight-loss expectations for each phase.

Here’s another small but useful fact:To burn 1kg of fat, your body needs to create a calorie deficit of about 7,700 kcal.If you maintain a daily deficit of 500 kcal, it will take roughly 15.4 days to lose 1kg of fat — that’s just 60–70 grams per day.In other words, true fat loss happens much more slowly than we often imagine.When you see dramatic drops in the early stages of dieting — like “lost 5 pounds in 3 days” or “10 pounds in a week on a liquid cleanse” — most of that isn’t fat at all.It’s water weight, glycogen, and undigested food leaving your system.In reality, even if you ate nothing for an entire day, you’d lose at most a few hundred grams of actual fat — barely noticeable on the scale.

Food intake or exercise expenditure required to burn 1kg of fat

Some people also hit what’s known as a “plateau” after a while, where the scale stops moving. Sometimes it’s because the calorie deficit has disappeared — you’re eating as much as you burn — but other times, it’s because your body has stabilized its water balance.Since real fat loss progresses at just a few dozen grams a day, these changes are too small for your scale to detect.If you stay consistent for another week or two, or even a few weeks, the numbers will eventually reflect your progress.But if you panic, slash calories too aggressively, and push your body too hard, you’ll end up losing muscle instead of fat — which is far more harmful. That’s why the key to healthy, sustainable weight loss is not speed, but consistency.Focus on a steady deficit, prioritize adequate protein intake, and your body will respond safely and effectively over time.

Weight Loss Duration: 3 to 6 Months Is Ideal

While it’s important not to rush weight loss, it’s equally unwise to drag it out indefinitely. A diet that lasts too long can become unsustainable and even lead to potential nutritional or health issues. According to domestic nutrition reports and recommendations from the U.S. CDC, the ideal weight-loss cycle lasts between 3 to 6 months, with a target reduction of 5% to 10% of total body weight, and no more than 15%. This approach is both realistic and easier to maintain in the long term. For those who are severely obese, the proportion of total weight loss can be slightly higher, or divided into several stages — but as always, such individuals should seek professional medical guidance and follow doctors’ recommendations rather than attempt to do it alone.

The Right Way: Change Your Lifestyle — Let Weight Loss Be the Byproduct

Mistake #4: Focusing Only on Losing Weight Without Changing Habits

Finally, the real question: how did I actually lose weight?

Month 1: Healthy Eating — Laying the Groundwork

I officially began my weight-loss journey during the Lunar New Year holiday. Conveniently, my mother was staying with me at the time — yes, the same “legendary” mom I mentioned before — and her presence instantly elevated the nutritional quality of my meals. Thanks to her, I transitioned into fat-loss mode smoothly and painlessly. Here’s what her everyday meal plan looked like:

Breakfast started with a glass of fresh milk and a boiled egg per person — that’s the baseline. In addition, she’d steam 2–3 kinds of wholesome starches, such as yam, pumpkin, purple sweet potato, or corn. Don’t worry — each type was limited to just one piece or half of one, combined into a small shared plate for four people, so everyone could pick what they liked.Sometimes she’d also steam a small bowl of beef shank or tendon — just one slice per person — for a protein boost. As for vegetables and fruits, there was always something fresh: either a lightly stir-fried portion of bok choy with almost no oil, or a few pieces of cut fruit like apple or kiwi — about two or three slices per person.Her style of cooking was clean, balanced, and perfectly portioned — exactly the kind of foundation I needed to start losing weight without feeling deprived.

I didn’t take a single photo of our Spring Festival meals. Just look at the state of our fridge after three meals a day for four people. (My parents’ fridge was always practically empty—when I was hungry as a kid, I could only drink milk or eat boiled eggs.)

In the evenings, since my parents were staying with me, I usually turned down dinner invitations and ate at home with them. For the three of us, dinner typically consisted of three dishes, all served in 8-inch plates. One dish was always a stir-fry with shredded meat, paired with vegetables like mushrooms, leafy greens, or wood ear fungus. My mom insisted on buying organic lean pork from Hema, claiming she could taste the difference. I had never bought it myself, but after checking the price—respect.The second dish was usually the main protein — most often beef, though sometimes it would be a steamed fish, boiled shrimp, or a small bowl (about 6 inches) of slow-cooked pork ribs or lamb soup.The third dish was always a plate of pure leafy greens. And if the supermarket had an organic option, my mom always chose it — another big respect moment.As for oil and salt, let’s just say that during the entire month they stayed with me, the same bottle of oil and salt barely ran out. The flavor of every meal was, as always, delicately light and clean.

At lunchtime, I ate at work. At first, I still ordered takeout casually, but as my taste preferences shifted toward lighter meals, I began buying simple salads or light lunch boxes from Hema instead — paired with yogurt and some fruit. That added up to about 600 calories, which was enough to keep me full without ever feeling so hungry that I couldn’t focus in the afternoon.

After this month of dietary adjustment, my weight didn’t fluctuate much (hovering around 68–69kg), but my body felt noticeably better and more balanced. Plus, since my parents never snacked, my own snack intake dropped dramatically — a seemingly small change that later proved crucial to my successful weight loss.

Month Two: Eating Regularly and Consolidating Results

After my mom went home, I gave some serious thought to how I could maintain and solidify my progress.

For breakfast, I kept things simple as always — eggs, milk, and a slice of bread. It was already nutritionally balanced, so there was no need to change anything.

For lunch on workdays, I tried bringing my own meals, but honestly, I’m too lazy to do that every day — I managed maybe two or three times a week. Luckily, I’m not picky about food, and I’ve always had a solid appetite. My cooking is basic but satisfying: a quick stir-fry of broccoli with minimal oil paired with a braised chicken leg already feels like a treat. Using Guizhou-style sour soup base to cook fish slices with vegetables and noodles? Absolutely delicious. On lazier days, I’d boil buckwheat noodles and baby bok choy together, mix in soy sauce and mustard, and top it with two soft-boiled eggs — simple, quick, and surprisingly good.When I didn’t bring lunch, I continued to grab a customizable light meal from Hema, balancing calories and nutrition. For a slightly fancier lunch, I’d go to Wagas or Woods for an energy bowl. Let me be clear — I genuinely enjoy eating these meals; they’re delicious, not just “healthy food.” The only downside is the price — a bit steep to eat often.

Dinner was casual. I’d make a light, clean-flavored hotpot or a homemade healthy mala soup. Sometimes, I’d toss together a big salad with a mozzarella ball or an avocado. My ultimate go-to, though, was buying discounted Chaozhou beef slices from the supermarket — about 150g of tender cuts like hanging tender, shank, or brisket. A quick blanch, a bit of dipping sauce, and it’s unbelievably tasty. For carbs, I’d pair it with frozen rice balls or an oatmeal bowl — a small combo that somehow felt like a feast.

The amount we eat for lunch on weekends usually leaves no leftovers, and we keep dinner relatively simple.

On weekends, my partner and I would share a modest lunch with just enough food to finish, and dinner would usually be lighter. I also cut back significantly on takeout and sweet drinks — no more random milk teas or dessert deliveries just because it was the weekend. Still, I’d treat myself a little: if I cooked at home, I didn’t bother counting calories — it wouldn’t go overboard anyway. When eating out, though, I kept things in check. I used to easily consume 1,500–2,000 kcal in a single sitting, but now I tried to stay around 1,000–1,200 kcal and avoided the really heavy stuff like pig’s trotters, pork knuckles, or pure fat cuts. Compared to before, I’d say I’d definitely learned a bit of restraint.

Month Three to Four: The 5+2 Intermittent Fasting — A Quick Drop in Weight

During the first two months, even though I was eating very healthily, I started feeling anxious about how slowly the scale was moving. My weight kept hovering between 67–68 kg, and if I overate even slightly, it bounced back to 69 kg — basically right where I started. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t frustrated.

Then I came across the “5+2” intermittent fasting method — a plan where you eat normally for five days, and on two non-consecutive days, you strictly limit calorie intake (around 500–600 kcal per day) while extending your fasting window to boost fat burning.

To be honest, I’d always been skeptical of anything labeled “X-day diet” or “miracle weight loss plan.” But I decided to give this one a chance after reading the original book The Fast Diet, which explained the science behind it. It wasn’t just another fad — there were solid studies and data to back it up. Plus, seeing respected doctors like Chen Wei from Peking Union Medical College Hospital and Feng Xue from Fuwai Hospital recommend it gave me the confidence to try.

There are many imitations following the trend of “Intermittent Fasting.” Just read Dr. Morris’s original version.

The 5+2 method — eating normally for five days and restricting calories for two — fit my personality perfectly. I’ve always been a “three days of enthusiasm, two days of rest” type. Compared to the 16:8 method (16 hours fasting, 8-hour eating window), which demands strict daily discipline, the 5+2 felt much more sustainable. I could never stick to skipping breakfast like some people do, and honestly, there’s far less scientific evidence supporting 16:8 compared to 5+2. So, I remain cautious about the former — if you try it, do your research first.

Starting from the third month, I committed to the 5+2 routine for about eight weeks total, with 14 fasting days (I skipped two during my menstrual cycle). I followed it pretty faithfully. The first couple of fasting days were admittedly tough, but by the second week, my body had adjusted. I also picked up a few clever tricks: stocking up on low-calorie, high-volume foods like broccoli, black fungus, mushrooms, and konjac — the kind of “cheat foods” that keep you full without adding many calories. For timing, I usually started fasting around 2 p.m. one day and ended it at 2 p.m. the next, which made things surprisingly manageable. Even though I only consumed about 500 kcal in 24 hours, careful planning kept me from ever feeling unbearably hungry. The results were remarkable. Over those eight weeks, my weight dropped sharply from 67–68 kg down to 61–62 kg — a total loss of 6 kg. Toward the end, I actually started worrying I might be losing too fast (yes, that’s how chill I’d become). So when a business trip came up, I took it as a sign to pause the 5+2 routine and return to a more regular eating pattern.

Month Five to Now: Returning to Normal Eating — And Still Losing Weight

Starting from the fifth month, I began traveling frequently for work and even took a week-long vacation. I had mentally prepared myself for some rebound weight gain — but to my surprise, not only did my weight not go up, it actually continued to drop.Even while eating normally, socializing, and dining out as usual, my weight kept going down. After another two months, I naturally reached 58 kg, sometimes dipping to 57 kg, and rarely exceeding 59 kg. Since then, I’ve maintained this range steadily, without a single rebound. During the National Day holiday, I spent three days traveling through Inner Mongolia — eating and snacking my way through every town, morning to night. When I got back, my body quickly recalibrated my appetite on its own. I naturally returned to my normal eating rhythm, and my weight soon settled right back to its usual average.

To sum it up: if quick-fix, crash-style dieting is risky and unsustainable, then what is the right way to lose weight?

In the long run, there’s really only one sustainable path to effective weight loss — what I call “lifestyle-based weight management.” To stay slim and healthy for good, you have to make genuine, lasting changes to your daily habits. There’s no shortcut, and there’s no cheating the process.

The logic is simple. Everyone’s body naturally stabilizes around a certain “set-point weight,” determined largely by lifestyle — especially diet and physical activity. If your lifestyle doesn’t change, even if you slim down through extreme measures, your body will eventually drift back to the weight range that matches your old habits.

Losing weight isn’t the hard part — keeping it off is. It’s a truth so often repeated it’s almost cliché, but that doesn’t make it less real. The problem is, most people in a hurry to lose weight only care about getting thinner right now — and forget that what happens after matters even more.

For the theory of set point weight, I recommend reading Why We Eat (Too Much).

Let me give you two typical examples.Take Semaglutide, the so-called miracle weight-loss drug that’s been all over the internet these past few years. I’ve seen plenty of influencers praising its effects, and I’ve heard credible stories of celebrities and public figures who lost significant weight using it. But once I learned how it actually works, I decided to skip this “shortcut.” Here’s a quick explainer: with my BMI at the time, I wasn’t even medically qualified to use it. According to clinical guidelines, Semaglutide is only prescribed to people with a BMI over 30, or over 27 if they already have obesity-related health issues. And it must be used under a specialist’s supervision. Please — never self-medicate.

In simple terms, Semaglutide works by suppressing your appetite. It makes you less hungry and less interested in food, so you can “lose weight effortlessly” without constantly fighting cravings. But it comes with plenty of side effects. Beyond the potential risks to your pancreas, rapid weight loss can also cause what’s often called “Ozempic face” — facial sagging from fat loss. And even if you do slim down successfully, many people experience significant rebound weight gain once they stop the injections. The fatal flaw here is obvious: most people rely entirely on the medication without changing their lifestyle. Their eating habits remain unhealthy, they still don’t exercise, and they haven’t built routines that support their new weight. So they enjoy a few months of being slim — and then regain even more fat than before. The body becomes more prone to weight gain, not less.

That said, I’m not saying drugs like Semaglutide should never be used for weight loss. Every medical professional I’ve heard emphasize the same thing: patients who qualify must use the medication as a temporary aid — a window of opportunity to build sustainable habits like regular exercise and balanced eating. In the end, even if you take the shots, maintaining your results still depends on changing your daily life. There’s no escaping that truth — all roads lead to the same destination.

Now, let’s talk about an even more absurd fad: the so-called “liquid diet.” I still can’t understand how something with zero scientific basis managed to go viral. Maybe it’s because drinking only liquids limits food options so drastically that people end up cutting calories without realizing it?

But here’s the reality: it doesn’t matter whether your food is liquid or solid, hot or cold — what matters is the total nutritional content and calorie intake. If you consume the same number of calories, drinking them as liquids can actually make you hungrier, since liquids are far less satiating than solid foods. In the end, it’s just another illusion of “fast results” — and another trap waiting to backfire.

Juice isn’t as healthy as you might think—this knowledge has likely become common knowledge (though online data may not be entirely accurate).

Some influencers take things to an even more absurd level — they refuse to eat fruits and vegetables in solid form (because “solids make you gain weight”), and instead juice everything. This is the perfect example of how not to lose weight. Freshly squeezed fruit and vegetable juices have far lower nutritional value than the whole foods they come from. Plus, drinking juice floods your body with large amounts of free sugars, which can cause dramatic blood sugar spikes and crashes — making you even hungrier afterward. I’ve yet to see anyone actually succeed long-term with this method. From what I’ve observed, most influencers who try it lose weight rapidly at first, only to rebound just as quickly — and visibly, their body shape barely changes. Honestly, it’s not worth torturing yourself just to see a smaller number on the scale.

Summary: Key Takeaways for Healthy, Sustainable Weight Loss

So, what does real, lifestyle-based weight loss look like?

In the early stages, the most important factor — by far — is diet management. Food decisions account for at least 70–80% of your success, making it the highest return on effort. To lose weight effectively, you’ll need to invest time and mental energy in understanding what and how you eat.If you’re overweight, focus on adjusting your diet first. Don’t worry too much about exercise at the beginning — once your eating habits stabilize and you start seeing progress, then you can gradually add physical activity.

Eat Less Processed Food

The first rule of weight loss: learn to filter what you eat. To borrow from writer Michael Pollan: “Don’t eat anything your great-grandmother wouldn’t recognize as food.”That means cutting back on cakes, desserts, sugary drinks, and anything from the snack aisle at the supermarket. Eat less of them if you can, or better yet, quit them entirely.

The health risks of ultra-processed foods are well documented. They’re typically loaded with fats, sugars, and sodium, which can lead to weight gain and increase the risk of metabolic diseases like diabetes, hypertension, and high cholesterol. They also distort your palate, making you crave stronger, more artificial flavors over time. If you’re new to understanding this, I recommend starting with the book Glucose Revolution — or any good science-based guide about how processed foods impact your metabolism and appetite.

I can totally relate to this — I used to be obsessed with anything creamy. I’d often buy desserts or milk tea with a thick cream cap, and I had a habit of stocking up on viral snacks from Sam’s Club or Hema every few weeks. When I first started losing weight, I forced myself to cut back for a month or two. Over time, though, the cravings just… faded. Now, even when I occasionally treat myself, it doesn’t taste nearly as good as I remember. That desperate, almost addictive urge to eat sweets is gone. So if I had to name just one key to my successful weight loss, it would be this: quit snacking. Breaking the habit of mindless snacking changes everything.

Understand Calories and Nutrition Basics

Anyone who’s ever tried to lose weight has probably tracked calories at some point. And honestly, learning to read nutrition labels — and getting a rough idea of the calories and nutrients in common foods like fruits, vegetables, meats, and grains — is useful for everyone, not just people on a diet.

That said, calorie counting online is often a mess. Some people wildly overestimate — like a skinny influencer claiming she ate 10,000 calories in one sitting (please, that’s competitive eating territory). Others underestimate — for example, certain WeChat accounts that “analyze” restaurant meals but somehow list greasy stir-fries or rice bowls as low-calorie. It’s misleading and, frankly, ridiculous. In reality, calorie calculation follows simple principles:

  • 1 gram of carbs = ~4 kcal
  • 1 gram of protein = ~4 kcal
  • 1 gram of fat = ~9 kcal

Water, salt, and fiber (a form of carbohydrate that’s mostly indigestible) don’t really count toward calories. Alcohol, however, is surprisingly high — 1 gram of pure alcohol = ~7 kcal, so it’s best to avoid drinking during weight loss.

Cooking methods also matter. Dishes that are boiled, steamed, or dry-mixed tend to be lower in calories, while the hidden calorie bombs usually come from sauces — like sesame paste, chili oil, or the infamous mayonnaise — and from the sheer amount of oil used in restaurant or packaged foods. Sometimes, the sauce or oil alone can contain more calories than the food itself.

Numerous online food calorie charts exist, with those for whole foods being the most accurate. Be sure to carefully evaluate and compare them.

Once you understand those basics, it becomes much easier to make quick, educated guesses about food choices. Most fresh vegetables are high in water and fiber, so even 100 grams usually contain only a few dozen calories. Simple cold dishes or stir-fries are safe options you can enjoy freely. Fruits, while higher in natural sugars than vegetables, are still rich in water and fiber — so unless you’re eating them in extreme quantities, there’s no need to obsess over every gram. For everyday staples like eggs, milk, and yogurt, it helps to memorize their approximate calorie values. Among meats, lean cuts (higher in protein, lower in fat) are much lower in calories than fatty ones. So when trying to lose weight, avoid skin and fatty cuts, and eat more chicken, fish, shrimp, and lean beef. Reduce intake of lamb, pork, and other high-fat meats when possible.

When it comes to carbs, learn to distinguish between raw and cooked weights — a common pitfall for calorie tracking. But more importantly, focus not just on calorie counts but also on the glycemic index (GI) of your staples, as well as the order and manner in which you eat. For example:

  • Eat vegetables before your main carbs.
  • Avoid mixed “rice bowl” dishes where sauce soaks into the rice — eat your food separately when you can.
  • Skip soup made from instant noodles or oily broths — you’ll avoid a surprising amount of extra fat and sodium.

Once you get the hang of these basic rules, it’s helpful to check nutrition charts now and then and remember some exceptions. For instance:

  • Garlic sprouts may be a vegetable, but they’re relatively high in carbohydrates — count them as part of your starch intake.
  • Jujubes, passion fruit, and durian are high in sugar, while avocado and coconut meat are rich in fat — enjoy in moderation.
  • Foods like chicken feet, pork trotters, pork neck meat, and dried tofu skins are “hidden fat traps.”
  • Eggplant and even eggs can absorb a surprising amount of oil depending on how they’re cooked — so choose preparation methods carefully.

Learning these details won’t turn you into a nutritionist overnight, but it will make you a much smarter eater — one who knows how to enjoy food without sabotaging progress.

During weight loss, pay close attention to reliable food calorie assessments.

Of course, while calories matter, they shouldn’t be idolized. Counting every calorie is far less important than maintaining balanced nutrition. During weight loss, it’s crucial to get enough protein, consume sufficient healthy fats and carbs, and prioritize quality oils — these are basic fundamentals. Also, unless you have professional equipment, it’s nearly impossible for ordinary people to calculate calorie intake precisely. Apps like Boohee (or similar calorie trackers) often rely on user-submitted data, which can be unreliable. Even official nutrition labels — leaving aside deliberate misreporting — are legally allowed a ±20% margin of error, which is a huge range. And anyone who has ever weighed cooked rice knows how wildly its calorie count can vary depending on how it’s made. So don’t get too hung up on precision — calorie tracking is a learning process. Check references, think critically, and gradually build intuition. It’s really not that hard.

If you’re truly worried about going over your calorie target, here’s the golden rule: just eat less. Any high-calorie food, eaten in small enough amounts, won’t be a problem. Love nuts because they’re rich in healthy unsaturated fats but afraid of their calories? Fine — eat just a few. One or two pecans or hickory nuts (around 10g) equals roughly 100 kcal — totally manageable. Can’t quit sweets yet? Even if you sneak one spoonful (15–20g) of whipped cream a day, that’s still under 100 kcal. The key is reasonable proportions and total intake control, not absolute elimination.

That’s also why the 5+2 intermittent fasting method works so well. Beyond its scientific rationale, it’s especially effective for people who can’t accurately calculate calories. On fasting days, if your limit is 500 kcal, then no matter how wrong your math is, you’ll still end up eating less — because it’s simply impossible to overeat within that cap.

Keep a relaxed mindset — focus on long-term trends

As I mentioned before, fat accumulation and fat loss both take time. Neither happens overnight, nor do they show up instantly on the scale. So if you overeat at one meal, don’t stress — just eat a bit lighter for the next few, and it’ll even out naturally. Conversely, if you’re usually careless with food, starving yourself for a day or two won’t make any real difference in the long run. “Cheat meals” are fine once in a while — a little indulgence can keep you sane — but having a “cheat day” every few days, going all out and wiping out the calorie deficit from your previous efforts, is pure self-deception. Moderation and patience win every time.

Even during a relatively smooth weight loss journey, minor fluctuations in weight are perfectly normal.

On social media, many people trying to lose weight — especially young women — tend to make the same mistake at the very beginning: they set extremely strict dietary rules for themselves, maintaining a tense, almost militant state of control. Then, the moment they eat a little more than planned, their mindset collapses — they feel like the sky is falling, and soon spiral into binge eating.This kind of mental loop is dangerous. Not only does it sabotage any chance of real weight loss, but as I’ve mentioned before, it can seriously harm both physical and mental health. In more severe cases, it can develop into binge eating disorder or anorexia nervosa — both are classified as mental illnesses. The latter, anorexia, is especially frightening: it has one of the highest mortality rates among psychiatric disorders. Please, take this seriously — no body shape is worth sacrificing your life for.

Introduce Moderate Exercise and Adjust Daily Habits

When it comes to exercise, I didn’t do much during my weight loss journey — roughly the same as before. For cardio, I averaged about 6,000 steps a day, occasionally biking. Later, thanks to some rehab training I did at the hospital for my legs, I learned a variety of lower body and core strengthening exercises and began adding light strength training to my routine. Even though I only did low-intensity sessions twice a week, which burned minimal calories, the long-term results were obvious: my legs felt stronger, and my core more stable. Strength training is absolutely worth it — not just for shaping the body in the later stages of weight loss, but also because as we age, our muscle mass declines year by year. Regular training is essential for maintaining quality of life. I share this as encouragement: let’s keep moving, for our future selves.

One final suggestion: if you’re starting out with a higher body weight, it’s better to focus first on improving sleep quality and getting sunlight rather than jumping straight into intense workouts. Heavy training at the beginning increases the risk of injury. Instead of forcing yourself to hit the gym after a long workday, try taking a few extra walks — especially during winter lunch breaks, when you can soak up some sun. Prioritize restful sleep, deep breathing, and even a bit of mindfulness to relieve daily stress and anxiety. This kind of lifestyle balance actually helps with weight loss more than punishing yourself with exhaustion.

Keep Learning, Keep Growing

One of the biggest takeaways from my weight loss journey was how much scientific knowledge about healthy living I gained along the way. I was shocked to realize that, despite being an adult, I had known almost nothing about basic nutrition or exercise science before. The truth is, health can’t rely on shortcuts or external motivation — if you don’t learn and think for yourself, you’ll easily fall for pseudoscience, fad diets, or expensive “wellness” traps. Over time, these bad habits can quietly harm your body.

Aside from the books I mentioned earlier, I highly recommend Dr. Feng Xue’s Scientific Weight Loss Method or her audio course “16 Lectures on Scientific Weight Loss” on Dedao. I revisited her material multiple times during my journey — first to understand the basics, later to reflect while practicing — and found it incredibly useful. Dr. Feng Xue is a top-tier hospital physician with deep expertise in obesity treatment and real clinical experience. As a reliable, evidence-based source, her work is one of the best guides for anyone seeking to lose weight the healthy, sustainable way.

I recommend that anyone trying to lose weight — whether you’re reading books or following online creators — seek out sources with real professional credibility. Avoid those so-called “nutritionists,” “fitness coaches,” or “health mentors” who constantly make factual mistakes, as well as the doctors who clearly signed with MCN agencies and churn out the same scripted short videos. Instead, try to find qualified medical professionals specializing in weight management who share real clinical cases. Many of them post videos or articles documenting their consultations with patients, offering authentic examples and practical medical advice. Following that kind of content can quickly help you build a scientifically sound understanding of weight loss.

Finally, if I had to admit one “bad habit” I developed during my weight loss journey, it would be this: I became addicted to food videos. I used to be someone who never scrolled through social media for long, but after losing weight, I found myself captivated by people eating — especially those ordinary vloggers (not professional eaters) who just eat heartily and look genuinely satisfied. Strangely enough, even though I no longer crave food and my appetite is perfectly stable, watching others enjoy their meals became oddly comforting. In hindsight, I understand why: food used to hold such an important place in my life, and now that I’ve consciously reduced its role, I naturally look for a way to fill that emotional gap. Watching food videos — seeing others savor what I’ve learned to enjoy in moderation — has become, in a way, my quiet compromise with myself and with this whole journey of weight loss.